Last night the husband and I were at dinner, trying to think of *something* to talk about besides babies, and the conversation switched to our faith. After thought, I declared, "You know, I feel like we're living in Patmos."
"Patmos?" He replied.
"Yes, we definitely live in Patmos."
"No, we don't."
"We don't?" I incredulously asked.
(laughing) "No, honey, we live in BABYLON."
Touche, dear husband, touche. We are in the belly of the beast, trying to keep the flame of faith alive in an uncompromisingly spiritually devoid place. When I first moved to Cambridge, the city seemed to exist in shades of gray. After a few months, I realized, "This city has turned its back on God." There is an ethos here that rejects what is good, what is right, what is healthy in the name of militant individualism. We have made a god of secularism, of hippies, of "alternative" and "progressive" thought. Ann Coulter was right--liberalism can be a religion, complete with mantra, dogma, and consequences. Even the origin and afterlife are explained by Darwinism and atheism.
Now that we live in the suburbs, it's not quite as strong, but it is still painfully present. Our home often feels like an outpost, and I spend so much time in defense mode that I rarely nuture my faith. Those who defend their farms against constant attack rarely have time to till and harvest, and I have been struggling so hard to keep what I have that I haven't grown in faith. I wonder sometimes how Christians felt before the fall of Rome, when good sense had gone the way of the wind and self-indulgence was law. Did they feel isolated too?
In better news, I have figured out a way to try to work from home. I'm going to try to drum up some business in editing, as I'm really good at it, enjoy it, and get paid to do it already. Here's the site I've developed. If you know any college/grad students or authors, point them my way! The husband and I are thinking that we'll begin trying to conceive this winter, barring unforeseen problems. I really hate that we've had to put it off.
And in still better news, the husband also had a long talk with his boss about promotions. It looks like in order to fast-track him, we'll have to leave in two and a half years to go to the next council. Darn! And I was SO hoping to stay. This is great news because if we leave in 2.5 years we'll 1) get a cheaper house, 2) he'll get bigger raises more often, and 3) well, we'll get to leave. The first two things also mean we'll be able to afford more kids while I stay home. Woohoo! I realize this is all in the future, but I am pleased that it looks like our rock-and-a-hard-place conundrum is temporary.
I think we're going to tidy the house (haven't done dishes in a week!) and then go for a hike. It'll be great! Chester would be excited if we'd say the word "walk," but we've been putting it off because we don't want him to go bonkers an hour before it's time to go.
Ooo, ooo, will I say it? "Chester, do you wanna go for a walk? You DO??" Hee hee.
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2 comments:
Okay, I can't resist...
Where is the next council? Is it by any chance South and a little bit West?
Great post, and thanks for informing me about the comments on my blog.
As for Ms. Coulter, as much as she grates my nerves I feel her frustration. I've dealth with people who happen not to be religious, and I've dealth with Athiests. They honesltly don't see themselves as religious even though they have no problem being zealous with promoting thier belief system usually through political means.
Politicians wonder why the population of Massachusetts is depleteing, but the laws to protect, support, and encourage families are non-exsistent i.e. husabnd provides and wife nutures while having children. And most of my peers simply just move away once they have at least two children.
For me this is home, so my husband and do not want to leave but it is struggle.
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